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Behavior inflation is similar to economic inflation
Introduction
Welcome to this issue of the Stoic Street Smarts Chronicle. This issue elaborates on an idea I've tweeted about a few times in the past—the older you get, the tougher the world is on you for not having your life together.
I use the analogy of inflation to make the idea clear.
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How Human Behavior Is Subject To Inflation
When you’re a teenager, no one expects much out of you. Sure, there are outliers of extreme ability and achievement, but no one looks to a teenager to have their life figured out. Although they are autonomous, they’re still the responsibility of their parents.
By your late 20s, you’re expected to have met specific measures of life proficiency. For example, you’re not dependent on your parents.
By this age, everyone at least expects that you can hold down a job and pay for your existence in this world. You may still be overcoming the mistakes of your youth or the effects of a shoddy upbringing, but the only consistent societal marker of growth here is that you can pay your bills and you aren’t a criminal.
By your late 30s, you’re expected to be an adult. This age is where a division happens.
On the one side are people who are at least keeping pace with the average income level, health, and relationships. The other side is populated by those who did not do the hard things to increase their earning capacity or viability for a relationship or let their fitness deteriorate.
The greatest non-innate difference between teenagers and adults is their responsibility levels.
Even at age 19, when you’re technically an adult, you can’t take on much responsibility. Unless you have children or you’re caring for dying parents, you have virtually no responsibility. But your life doesn’t have the trappings of many rewards either.
If you’re 35 and haven’t taken on any responsibilities that have forced you to grow and mature, you’ll still have the value of a 19-year-old, but you’ll be measured against others in your age range.
For example, while it’s nice if a guy has his own place, most 19-year-old girls won’t care if another 19-year-old boy still lives with his parents, works a low-wage job, and spends his free time drinking and playing video games. Most boys her age will have a similar level of value, so it’s more like hitting the jackpot if she lands a top athlete or a trust fund kid than it feels like settling if she doesn’t—especially if the guy is attractive.
The same goes for friendships as well. At 19, everyone’s idea of a good time is drinking a case of beer, ordering pizza, playing video games, and partying in someone’s basement with cheap beer. However, if your idea of a good time at 30 still regularly involves getting drunk and playing video games all day, you have nothing more valuable to devote your time to.
Any friends you have will be equally of low value. That lifestyle is passable at 19, but at 30, now anyone you date will feel like they’re settling. Even if they’re just as low-value and immature, losers don’t like spending time with other losers. Those are just the only people who will spend time with them.
| Read the rest of the newsletter on my website |
Cool things I read this week
- Books and Biceps Newsletter: When I first got into writing online, this is the type of newsletter I imagined I'd create one day. Jon Finkel writes about sports, fatherhood, coaching, and learning. His books have been endorsed by the likes of Mark Cuban, Kevin Durant, and Spike Lee.
- Ground News Bias Checker Extension: This isn't so much something I read as it's something I discovered. I've long complained about media bias and how it drums up polarization to generate more clicks. I recognize that not everyone wants their biases uncovered, but for the ones who do, the bias checker extension helps you to identify bias in news stories you read. If you're interested in being better informed but without the anger, I recommend checking this out.
Social media round-up
- YouTube: My channel cracked 2k subscribers! A small but significant victory. I'd love for you to subscribe as well.
Stoic Street Smarts
Teaching what I've learned from the hood, the ring, and everything in between. Join 35k other readers to learn how to manage risk, build relationships, and confront reality.
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